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What You Need to Know as a Mum of a Teenager Journeying with Mental Illness

Updated: Jun 21, 2021

June in North America is like December in the Southern Hemisphere … end of the school year is already exhausting.

Add a pandemic and will teens or won’t teens graduate with their friends and family? Will they or won’t they get into post-secondary school? Will they or won’t they get vaccinated?

Will they or won’t they feel comfortable in their own skin for summer? Will they or won’t they get a job? Or stay connected to friends? Or be able to travel?

And the list goes on.

So for every mother of a teen challenged with their own mental health right now, OR to the young adult who is struggling themselves, OR to the mother experiencing unrest mentally and emotionally, here are a few things you need to know:

1. It’s NOT personal when they don’t have control over their emotional regulation yet.

Emotional regulation is difficult at the best of times with hormonal dynamics playing a huge role in their body. But these tools take time to learn.

Consider taking a step back from your own triggered response. Breathe. Pause. Try not to escalate the situation because of what it makes you feel to be the focus of their reaction.

2. Your presence, although seemingly being rejected, is crucial.

Some teens will want space, and others will only feel more rejected if you walk away. Mums, you still get to place boundaries around how you will and won’t be talked to. And often that needs to be reviewed later rather than in the moment.

But consider staying around the room. Or sitting somewhere still within connection point. Love in presence is so crucial. No matter how far away they ask you to go.

3. Find a trusted tribe of professional and personal support systems as you seek a diagnosis and treatment.

So if you need to engage the medical profession, and they want to give you a diagnosis or suggest medication, you have already dived deep into your own paradigm and beliefs about medication and treatment.

I needed to talk this through with a few safe and trusted people so they could really help me understand why medication may be a needed route for Avalon for a season (She has given me permission to write this).

4. Model doing the deep work yourself so it normalizes the journey for your kids or friends.

Get help if you need it yourself!

Lately I have had some mother’s reach out to enquire would I coach their teenager and instead we have discovered it is HER who needs the support herself.

And once SHE is feeling supported, she has something stronger to offer her family.

This is a long term journey

Not for the faint-hearted.

But I promise you, you have got what it takes to walk this out. You are graced for this. And I would be more than honoured to explore how I can help you. Feel free to book a Discovery Call here

With much love ❤️

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